#!/bin/bash

if [ "$1_" == "_" ]; then
	echo "dirty: no legumes found! Please attach a legume to your AGP bus"
	exit 1
fi

if [ "$1" != "dirty" ]; then
	echo "dirty: still too clean"
	exit 1
fi

if [ "$2_" == "_" ]; then
	echo "dirty: i386 compatible! This program doesn't work on i386 boxen"
	exit 1
fi

case $2 in
	dirty)	echo "dirty: too much dirt!" ; exit 1;;
	telephone) echo -e "Ring ring, ring ring!\nWhat happen?\nSomeone set up us the telephone!\nWe get signal!\nMain telephone turn on..." ;;
	[tT]ustin) echo "I agree.";;
	shoes|shonky) echo "You have got your memes crossed.";;
	[jJ]ava) echo "NullPointerException. Naa-naa-na-naa-naa.";;
	[cC]|[cC]++) echo "Filthy language. Use badger instead.";;
	[Bb]ernard) echo "How do you know about Bernard?";;
	[Ii]laria) echo "Oh my god! She is, how you say, so dirty!";;
	[Oo][Ss]) echo "NO! Try 'Fuck Comp2009'"; ;;
	*) echo "dirty $@";;
esac

